Spring 2020 – Housing Concerns
Leaving or staying in your home
This season’s discussions are about how your home might no longer work for you, and how you can find ways to make your housework for you.
Is someone’s home getting difficult to maintain? Are normal routines no longer safe? Some of these issues sneak up on us. Maneuvering steps that used to be easy, are now more difficult. Normal chores around the home are exhausting.
Has it happened to you, yet? Carpeting still feels comfy, but using a walker is not so easy, or safe. It takes longer to do normal maintenance like shoveling snow, mowing the lawn, taking out garbage, or it’s just too difficult.
Changing health and mobility issues usually accompany people as they grow older. Depending on how your family handles these issues, it can be the difference between making life miserable, lonely and worrisome, or much safer and more comfortable.
Does it seem to you your parent’s home is too large for them? They have too much clutter, or stuff. They can’t do what they used to be able to do by themselves? Their 2-story housing situation could be better, in your opinion, but they don’t want to see it, or even talk about it.
Lack of communication, and not working together, are the primary reasons for this becoming a problem. You can suffer alone, or find ways to gather more information, support, and care.
Holding a family meeting can find solutions that make growing older easier, safer, and more enjoyable.
Aging in place – how you can fix up your house to make it work for you.
This is from a January 2019 article in Next Avenue.
Ways to Find a Home Remodeler for Aging in Place
Why working with a Certified Aging-in-Place Specialist may be helpful
- By Stan Gornicz, January 23, 2019
A decade and a half ago, when our kids were young, we added rooms to our home to create more space for family and friends. In our 40s at the time, and with retirement not yet in sight, my wife (an elder care specialist), suggested we incorporate elements into our design that would make our home suitable for chasing future grandchildren from room to room. Our plan ultimately incorporated one-floor living, wider doorways and lever-style door handles.
In short, we made our home ready to age in place.
Many other homeowners are eager to age in place, too. An AARP survey found that almost 90 percent of people over 65 want to stay in their residences for as long as they could. If you’d like to renovate your home accordingly, you’ll want to find a specialist to help you do so.
The National Association of Home Builders (NAHB) and AARP have developed the Certified Aging-In-Place Specialist (CAPS) program for just this purpose. Although most CAPS pros are home remodelers, they can also be health professionals such as occupational therapists who are experts with physical mobility issues.
The Certified Aging-in-Place Specialists fine tune the concept of universal design — eliminating barriers for people of all ages — and focus on issues critical to the aging population. The cost for home modifications can range from a couple hundred dollars for widening a doorway to several thousand dollars or more, for remodeling a bathroom.
“I’m hearing that most people want to continue living in their own homes,” said Bill McHugh, the CAPS-certified owner of Tier 1 Group, a design/build firm in Leander, Texas. “They’re looking for the comfort, security and independence that only their home can provide.”
McHugh first started helping clients figure out the basics of getting in and out of the house as their physical limitations increased. His approach has since evolved into an organized script. “I ask the ‘what if’s,’ and do a little discovery,” McHugh said.
The outcomes are different for each homeowner, whose modifications are often driven by specific physical conditions or diseases.
“I’m seeing a trend in bathroom renovations for people 60 years or older,” McHugh said. “The most common modifications involve widening doorways, raising electrical outlets, lowering light switches, installing lever door handles, enhancing overhead lighting and integrating walk-in showers.”
To find a Certified Aging-in-Place Specialist, check out the NAHB’s CAPS online directory which lets you locate pros by ZIP code. And the organization’s Aging-in-Place Remodeling Checklist has a comprehensive listing of modifications that could help you age in place.
What to Look for When Hiring a Pro
Consider the following when hiring an aging-in-place pro:
Select several contractors in your area who are CAPS certified. You can find CAPS contractors by searching the NAHB directory. Aside from searching the NAHB directory, you may want to ask family, friends and neighbors for recommendations based on projects they have completed.
Meet each contractor in person to determine if there is a good personality fit. You’ll be working together for days, weeks or even months, sometimes under stressful conditions. It’s important that you and your contractor communicate easily at every stage of the project to effectively monitor expectations.
Request the names, addresses and phone numbers of customers who have completed projects similar to yours. Ask each if he or she was satisfied and about the construction team’s daily work habits, whether there was proper cleanup each day and upon completion and if their project was finished on time. This will help you form a knowledgeable opinion of remodelers you’re considering. You may even want to visit homes of some of these customers to examine the quality of the work performed.
Look at websites you trust to check online contractor ratings. Read comments from past customers there.
Get at least three written bids for your project, making sure the plans, specifications and material lists are the same. Don’t automatically choose the lowest bidder. Ask questions if there are significant differences in price; there may be a good reason to pay more than the lowest offer.
Make sure the contractor is licensed for the type of work you’re planning. Ask for a copy of the license and copies of licenses for each subcontractor who’ll work on the job. Licensing regulations vary by state and municipality; check with the building officials in your area.
Ask for certificates of insurance to verify workers’ compensation and personal liability coverage for the contractor and all subcontractors. This way, you’ll ensure that repair costs will be covered if workers get hurt or an accident causes damage on your property or your neighbor’s.
Check with your local Better Business Bureau. The agency can tell you if there have been complaints filed against the contractor.
Insist on a detailed building contract. You’ll want to see specifics for the important elements of the project, including:
- Total cost
- Begin and end dates
- Payment schedule
- Responsibility for obtaining building permits and arranging for inspections
- How project changes are handled
- Warranties for materials and workmanship; what’s covered and how long it remains in effect
Typically, a small down payment (generally around 10 percent) is required when signing the contract, followed by incremental payments based on completed stages of the project. The final payment is made upon satisfactory completion and inspection of all work.
“Offering aging-in-place methods is a niche service,” McHugh said. “We’re not seeing enough contractors adapt these principles into their building standards. Hopefully, as the population ages, so will the number of professionals ready to accommodate it.”
Financing Aging-in-Place Home Modifications
There are many options to finance aging-in-place home modifications, including government assistance. Here are a few:
State and Local Grants Many state and local governments offer programs to provide financial assistance for home modifications that will let residents live at home. Contact your local office of the National Council of State Housing Agencies to learn more.
Assistance for Energy Savings The U.S. Department of Energy offers assistance to modify homes for energy savings through its Weatherization Assistance Program and Low Income Home Energy Assistance Program.
Veterans The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs offers vets grants to remove barriers and adapt to mobility devices.
Rural Homeowners The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) offers rural development loans and grants to low-income elderly or disabled people in rural locations. Contact your local USDA office for eligibility information.
Home Equity Tapping the equity you’ve built up in your home, through a lender, is another option to finance upgrades.
By Stan Gornicz Stan Gornicz is a corporate writer and editor living in Wethersfield, Conn. He is currently working on a memoir about family values.
Tips
Q. “Our parents are having trouble staying in their home. There are too many stairs, they can no longer keep the house clean or picked up, and it’s wearing them out. We’ve talked with them, but they don’t want to move. What can we do?”
A. Maybe they’re frightened of “change”? Maybe they’re worried about leaving what’s familiar? Maybe there’s just too many memories to leave behind? Maybe this is a good asset they’re not ready to give up? For some older adults their home is their anchor in life. Even thinking about moving can cause stress.
Q. “Mom and dad need more day-to-day help. They don’t want to be a burden, so they don’t tell us what’s really going on. They say they don’t need our help. They also say they don’t want strangers in their home. They worry about the costs.”
A. Have you sat down and talked over what’s getting in the way, or what they’d like to do? Have they thought about hiring help to make things easier for them? Are there things the family and friends can do to make life easier?
Q. We don’t feel the house is safe for our parents, anymore. We’re worried.
A. Discuss the situation and share your concerns, reasons and perspective. For example, “I’m concerned about you falling down the stairs since your recent fall. I want you to be safe.” Take time to write down your specific concerns and ideas that may help. Set aside time to discuss your concerns with them. During any conversation, listen closely and try to understand their perspective.
Questions to ask yourself
- What am I worried about?
- Is it time to move, or are there other options?
- Why are mom and dad resisting discussing how they’re doing in their home? Why is our family not having this discussion with them?
- Do mom and dad need some paid help around the house? Do they want help? Who would they like to help?
- What cosmetic and structural changes would make their house more “livable”?
Helpful Tips: Discussing options to be staying in the current home, or making the leap to moving someplace else are often tied together. If there are services that cannot be provided to keep older adults safe and healthy, that’s something to figure out. Bringing in services may be one way to go. Another is some physical changes to the current home.
There are numerous changes people can make to anticipate potential issues that may come up as we get older. Some of these changes may be costly, some are inexpensive. Some ideas: Living in a single-story home. Bringing the laundry room up from the basement. Installing a chairlift up the stairs. Grab bars in the bathrooms. Handrails on outside steps. Better lighting all around the house. Wider doorways and halls to accommodate walkers and wheelchairs. Walk-in showers or bathtubs. Higher toilets. Arranging help for lawn mowing, snow shoveling, occasional meals, house cleaning, rides to appointments and grocery shopping. Having a student live in and help around the home in exchange for room and board. All may not work for you or your parents, but some might, or maybe you can think of others.
From the National Institute on Aging ( https://www.nia.nih.gov )
When It’s Time to Leave Home
The decision about whether your parents should move is often tricky and emotional. Each family will have its own reasons for wanting (or not wanting) to take such a step.
One family may decide a move is right because the parents can no longer manage the home. For another family, the need for hands-on care in a long-term care facility motivates a change.
In the case of long-distance caregivers, the notion of moving can seem like a solution to the problem of not being close enough to help. For some caregivers, moving a sick or aging parent to their own home or community can be a viable alternative. Some families decide to have an adult child move back to the parent’s home to become the primary caregiver.
Keep in mind that leaving a home, community, and familiar medical care can be very disruptive and difficult for the older parent, especially if they are not enthusiastic about the change. You might first want to explore what services are available in your parents’ community to help them in their home—including home health care, housekeeping, personal care, and transportation services.
Older adults and their families have some options when it comes to deciding where to live, but these choices can be limited by factors such as illness, ability to perform activities of daily living (for example, eating, bathing, using the toilet, dressing, walking, and moving from bed to chair), financial resources, and personal preferences.
Making a decision that is best for your parent—and making that decision with your parent—can be difficult. Try to learn as much as you can about possible housing options.
Read and share this infographic to get tips on how to make home safe and accessible while aging in place.
Older adults, or those with serious illness, can choose to:
- Stay in their own home or move to a smaller one
- Move to an assisted-living facility
- Move to a long-term care facility
- Move in with a family member
Some families find a conference call is a good way to talk together about the pros and cons of each option. The goal of this call is to come up with a plan that works for everyone, especially your parent. If the decision involves a move for your mom or dad, you could, even from a distance, offer to arrange tours of some places for their consideration.
Experts advise families to think carefully before moving an aging adult into an adult child’s home. There are a lot of questions to consider, for example:
- Is there space in your home?
- Is someone around to help the older person during the whole day?
- What are your parents able to do for themselves?
- What personal care are you willing and able to provide—moving your parent from a chair to a bed or toilet, changing adult diapers, or using a feeding tube, for example?
- What kinds of home care services are available in your community?
- What kind of specialized medical care is available nearby?
For More Information About Housing Options
Eldercare Locator
800-677-1116 (toll-free)
eldercarelocator@n4a.org
https://eldercare.acl.gov
LongTermCare.gov
202-619-0724
aclinfo@acl.hhs.gov
https://longtermcare.acl.gov/
For a free consultation contact us. rich@familyconversations.com or call 952 884-1128.
